


Thirst Trap

by TheInverseUniverse



Category: Alex Rider - Anthony Horowitz
Genre: Alex Rider is a thirst trap, Betaing? I don't know her, Crack, Future Fic, Social Media, University Student Alex Rider
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-19 05:08:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29621085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheInverseUniverse/pseuds/TheInverseUniverse
Summary: "Someone had commented five fire emojis on his Instagram post. He put the phone back down and covered his head again. Instagram wasn’t worth waking up for.Alex sat bolt upright. He didn’t have an Instagram account."------Alex Rider is a thirst trap. This is all Tom's fault.
Comments: 28
Kudos: 106





	Thirst Trap

**Author's Note:**

> If you think you know what inspired this, you're correct.

“Mate, I’m telling you, it’s not fair,” Tom slurred, pointing at Alex with the hand he was holding his beer in.

Alex and Tom had been at Uni for a year. After a year of gen eds, Alex was still undecided, while Tom was working diligently towards a film degree. Alex still worked for MI6 on school breaks and the occasional weekend. (Jones’ life may or may not have been threatened if he didn’t make it back for class on Mondays).

On this particular Friday night, Alex, Tom, and Tom’s girlfriend Adeline were in the boys’ flat drinking.

“Oh yeah?” Alex asked, smiling around his own beer.

“It’s not!” Tom insisted, flailing his hand around and spilling beer on the couch. “You’re fucking hot, man!”

Alex barked out a laugh and Adeline tried to stifle her own giggles.

“Oh, Alex!” Tom put on a falsetto, girlish voice. “You’re so dreamy! You have so many muscles and the figure of a Greek god!”

Adeline leaned up against him and batted her eyes dramatically. “Am I not enough for you? Do I need to be jealous?”

Adeline was a short girl with light brown hair that Tom had met in his cinematography class. They’d been together for four months, and Alex had a feeling that if their flat had enough room, she would have moved in by now.

Tom spluttered. “No! Don’t get me wrong, Alex is—” he paused and kissed the tip of his fingers. “But you’re fucking gorgeous. And Alex doesn’t have tits.”

Alex and Adeline burst out laughing again.

“I’m not woman enough for you?” Alex asked, holding his heart in faux injury.

“Shut up,” Tom said, flipping him the bird. He took another draw of his beer. “But seriously, mate. You’re fucking hot.”

Alex shrugged. He had his fair share of problems with his body. “Maybe until I take my shirt off.”

Tom shook his head emphatically. “Then you’re even hotter! Come on, mate, there’s nothing I haven’t seen.”

“Oh, really?” Adeline teased. “Do you and Alex have something to tell me?”

“I really hope you just mean the locker room,” Alex piled on.

Tom flipped him off again.

“I’m on Tom’s side,” Adeline said with a shrug. “You’re hot.”

“This is bullying,” Alex shot back. “I’m being bullied.”

Adeline pouted at him. “Oh poor baby, being bullied with how attractive you are.”

“I thought we were on the same side! We’re laughing at Tom!” Alex protested. 

Adeline took another drink and shook her head. “Sorry, I agree with him.”

“Some bullshit,” Alex muttered fondly. “Come on. Have you seen me without my shirt on? I have more scars than the surface of the moon.” During his first month at school, he had had a spectacularly bad night with a girl who’d started crying when he took his shirt off. They weren’t tears of joy.

“It can’t be that bad,” Adeline said.

Alex grimaced. “No, it can be. Trust me.”

“You get burned as a kid or something?” Adeline asked. She popped open another White Claw. 

“Amongst other things,” Alex admitted.

Tom scoffed and tried to sit forward. He was drunk enough that Adeline had to help him to the edge of the couch. “Even your burn scars look cool! I’m serious, mate. You’re hot, and your scars only add to it.”

“Agree to disagree,” Alex said.

“Adeline!” Tom shouted. “Tie breaker!”

“What?” Adeline asked.

“You need to be the tiebreaker,” Tom explained, working very hard not to slur his words. He had pregamed and was two drinks deeper than they were. “Alex, you gotta take your shirt off and let Adeline be the tiebreaker on if you’re hot or not.”

Alex laughed again. “You want your girlfriend to tell you how hot she finds your roommate? You thinking this through, bud?”

“I’m going to hate this tomorrow, I’m sure. But it’ll be worth it tonight.” Tom nodded, then kept nodding long enough for Adeline to put a hand on his head to still it.  
“Tom-” Alex tried.

“Take it off!” Tom cheered. He dug in his pockets and pulled out three quid and a handful of change. “I’ll make it rain!”

Alex rolled his eyes but grabbed the back of his shirt to pull it off. Then he paused and said, “Don’t throw coins at me.” He pulled his shirt off and stood in one smooth motion.

Tom hooted and sloppily threw the handful of money at him. The notes fluttered to the ground, but a 50p note smacked Alex on the cheek.

“Oi! I said don’t throw the pence at me,” Alex protested.

Tom ignored him and turned to Adeline, who looked Alex’s torso up and down appreciatively. “What’s the verdict?”

“Jury’s out,” Adeline said with a grin. “I think I need to see the whole thing. Give us a twirl.”

Alex shook his head but spun in a slow circle with his arms out like he was showing off a new shirt. “You’re perfect for each other. Arseholes, the both of you.” 

“Hmm.” Adeline tapped her chin contemplatively. “Strike a pose. Flex.”

“You heard the lady,” Tom agreed.

“I hate you.” Alex laughed as he flexed his arms, then turned and posed like Arnold. If he hadn’t been drunk, he never would have agreed to this. He was too self-conscious about his scars. “I’m not going to dance.”

Adeline pouted but said, “Fine, fine. I’ve come to my decision.” Tom pattered on his legs in an off rhythm drumroll as she sat up straight and announced, “Alex. You’re bloody hot.”

“Victory!” Tom crowed, standing from the couch and then falling back onto it.

“Two against one,” Adeline agreed. “You’re hot. The scars add to it, make you all rugged and dangerous looking.”

Alex shook his head and sat back down. He opened another beer and took a long pull. “Agree to disagree.”

“It’s okay, you’re allowed to be wrong,” Adeline said sweetly. “But Tom’s right. The burns on your back do look cool.”

“Whatever you say,” Alex said. He absentmindedly rubbed the knot of scar tissue over his heart. It had barely faded after all these years. 

Tom shook his head and pointed his beer at Alex again. “You need some self-confidence, man! Addy, when you feel fat, you do that thing.”

“Ooh, careful mate,” Alex warned.

Addy turned to Tom and raised an eyebrow. “Yes, careful. What do you mean?”

“You dress up all slutty and take hot pictures,” Tom said. Then he read the room and said, “I mean slutty in the best way possible! I am a huge fan of you dressing up slutty. But you do that to get confident, right?”

Addy nodded. “I do. Oh, that’s a great idea! Alex, we should do that!”

“I should dress like a tart?” Alex asked skeptically.

“We should take pictures! Like those Instagram models! So you can see how sexy you are,” Adeline explained. She kissed Tom on the cheek. “Great idea, babe.”

“You’re joking, right?” Alex asked.

“No!” Tom insisted. “It’s a great idea. Come on, photoshoot! Photoshoot! Let’s do it!”

Alex groaned. Tom and Adeline both looked at him eagerly, and he nodded. “Fine, I’ll do it. Just so you two shut up.”

Tom and Adeline high-fived.

\------

Why was the sun so bright?

Alex groaned and pulled his pillow over his face. He was too hungover for the sliver of sunlight that streamed through the crack in his curtain. His phone buzzed, and he groaned again before picking it up and squinting at the too bright screen.

Someone had commented five fire emojis on his Instagram post. He put the phone back down and covered his head again. Instagram wasn’t worth waking up for.

Alex sat bolt upright. He didn’t have an Instagram account. 

Scrubbing his hand across his face, he pulled his phone back up and saw that he had _five hundred_ Instagram notifications. What the hell?

The pink and orange app icon sat on the last page of his phone, where it hadn’t been last night. He strained to remember the last night, but the memories ended somewhere about doing a striptease for Adeline. He flushed at the memory, but remembered that Tom had insisted on it.

He opened the app and saw he did indeed have an account. But not under his name. Under the name _ScarredHottie_. What the hell?

And he had 10,000 followers.

There were exactly two posts on his account, and Alex began plotting Tom’s slow demise. It had to be his fault.

The two posts were both of Alex. One of him from behind wearing nothing but his sweat pants, reaching up and grabbing the door frame. It showed off his well muscled back, and all the scars on it. Including the rainfall of burn scars. The second post showed him lounging back on the couch, again only in his sweats. It was only from the neck down, and didn’t show his face, which was a small mercy.

The weirdest part was that the posts had 50,000 likes between them. It was only—okay 3pm was late for waking up—but it hadn’t even been a whole day. How was that even possible? And the comments. So many comments.

Each post had over two hundred comments. Most of them were emojis. Fire emojis and heart eyes emojis were the most common, but also some... lewder ones. The textual comments were in a similar vein, extolling his appearance and saying how much they were attracted to him. What. The. Hell.

“Tom!” He stormed into the main flat, but Tom wasn’t there. “Tom!” He barged into Tom’s room, where he and Adeline were still in bed.

“Mate!” Tom yelped, almost falling off the bed as Adeline scrambled to cover herself with the blanket. Neither of them looked any better than Alex had felt when he woke up.

“Why. The fuck. Do I have 50,000 likes on Instagram?” Alex demanded.

“50k? Nice!” Tom said. Then he frowned. “Wait. You don’t have an Instagram.”

Alex could have strangled him. “I don’t! But “ScarredHottie” does.”

“Scarred...” Tom trailed off. And then his eyes widened comically. “Oh my god. Instagram.”

“Thomas Harris, I swear to-”

Tom held his hands up in surrender. “Wait! Listen, you totally agreed last night. I think. You made the password at least.”

Having found her shirt from the floor, Adeline popped back up. “Fifty thousand? In like fifteen hours? How?”

“I don’t know!” Alex threw his phone at Tom, who fumbled to catch it. “I only use social media when M- work forces me to.”

Holding up a hand, Tom said, “Keep your pants on. Give me a second.” He scrolled through Alex’s phone for a few minutes, face warring between terror and elation, before he finally said, “Oh!”

“What?” Alex demanded.

“Another account saw your posts and promo-ed you,” Tom explained. “ _Thot_Watch_ linked to your account and they have like five millions followers. Which is why you have _Jesus Christ_ 11,000 followers.”

“What’s a thot?” Alex asked hotly.

This was finally too much for Adeline, who had been trying to contain her amusement this whole time. She collapsed in a peal of giggles, almost falling off the bed. Tom tried to catch her arm, but missed. When she recovered, she said, “It means that ho over there. They’re calling you a ho.”

Alex pointed at Tom. “You’re a dead man, Harris.”

Tom ducked behind Adeline and squawked, “Save me, Addy!”

“My knight in shining armor,” Adeline deadpanned.

“Delete it,” Alex ordered.

Tom hesitated. “You sure? I mean, you should at least read the comments. You’re on your way to becoming Instagram famous. There’s some serious money in it.”

“Oh my god,” Adeline said, face lighting up with absolute elation. “You’re a thirst trap.”

“A what?” Alex demanded.

Tom elbowed her. “Are you trying to get me killed?”

“You post sexy pictures to get attention,” Adeline explained.

Alex looked at Tom, who flinched.

“Look, mate,” Tom said, handing him back his phone. “If you want to delete it, wait until you’ve read all the comments at least. You could really make something out of this.”

“Delete it,” Alex said again.

Adeline grinned even wider. “You don’t know how to delete it, do you?’

Alex glared at her, but she didn’t flinch.

“I won’t teach you to delete it,” Tom declared. “You’ll have to figure it out yourself.”

Alex rolled his eyes. “You’re both arseholes.” He turned and left Tom’s room.

Back in the living room, he could hear Tom shout, “The internet thinks you’re hot!”

He was going to kill Tom.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Thirst Trap Illustration](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29652858) by [DaniWib](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaniWib/pseuds/DaniWib)




End file.
